Q: What’s wrong with my vagina? A: It wants to be romanced (and so do I, tbh)
It’s that feeling when you’re fumbling around in bed with your Tinder date and the foreign-ness of each other’s bodies leads to rushing as opposed to exploring. It’s the feeling when you have to walk out of your front door in ten minutes but could really, really use with a quickie with yourself. It’s the time when physical stimulation goes from zero to one hundred. Are these sometimes the best sexual encounters ever? Yes. Are they sometimes terrible? Yes.
My body tends to clamp up at “nothing to everything” physical touch. This can translate to dryness, physical pain during intercourse or just general lack of interest or drive.
People with vaginas tend to have bodies that like the long game. The slow burn. I remember as a teenager, a cool neighborhood mom told me she knew she was going to have sex with her husband that night because of a kind gesture he did earlier that morning. The mind and the vagina are, most of the time, a package deal. It’s hard to open up the V when your mind is not being aroused.
When it comes to wetting my whistle, a stimulating conversation always gets me going more than any physical “moves” a date could pull to get me out of my undies ASAP. My vagina and I need a little foreplay. I challenge myself and other people with vaginas to allow our bodies to be a fleshy scavenger hunt. Tiny treasures are buried from head to toe that can lead to all sorts of mouthwatering, sweat-inducing sensations. Let’s not let everyone off the seduction hook so quickly. Don’t give those who are lucky enough to touch you the easy way out (unless that gets you off). Make them work and have no apologies. People with vaginas tend to be more apologetic about taking longer to warm up or climax in sex– even resorting to faking it. A tragedy.
Don’t rush physical romance and excitement, let it come to you instead of the other way around. When it comes to you, you’ll feel it. And so will your vagina.•
Molly-Margaret Johnson is a Brooklyn based artist. While she is not a doctor, she is excited to share her vaginal experiences with others in hopes to answer questions and end taboos.
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